AI roasts. Real advice. Better you.
Know your disaster.
Escape it.
An unfiltered AI life check for your money, habits, and comeback arc. Get scored, roasted, and handed a move that actually helps.
Free to start. Zero productivity-guru energy.
Assessment console
•••> run assessment --full-life
Analyzing life data...
You are
The comeback arc starts here.
The readout
Life's hard.
We make it hilarious.
A quick, sharp read on where you are. No generic quiz results—just a personalized roast, a score, and the path out.
Tell us the damage.
Answer a fast set of questions on money, dating, fitness, career or school, sleep, screen time, stress, and goals.
Get the roast.
Our AI turns your answers into an honest score and a very specific reality check.
Start your arc.
Save the card, share the heat, and take the next move without the shame spiral.
Results, with receipts
Your money score
42/100
“Your savings account is mostly vibes, but you're one automated transfer away from a comeback.”
Not just a score
A roast you'll share.
Advice you'll use.
Every readout pairs the joke with a useful next step. You get the laugh, then the leverage.
- A personalized cooked percentage
- Your biggest strength and blind spot
- One clear next move for this week
Choose your heat level
Start free. Go deeper
when you're ready.
No guilt trip. The free check-in is useful on its own.
Free
Find out where you stand today.
$0 / month
- Unlimited basic check-ins
- One share-ready roast card
- A real next move, not a lecture
Premium
Escape planFor people building the comeback arc.
$7.99 / month
- Deeper Money Cooked reports
- Personalized comeback plans
- Progress tracking across your life score journey
- Premium coaching without shame or financial guarantees
Think you're less cooked
than your friends?
Prove it. Get your score, save the card, and let the group chat decide who needs a comeback arc first.
Get my cooked score